sift the sky for the almost-full moon; my
grandmother isn’t speaking to me. the urine test
returns: specific gravity abnormal. i place a kumquat
into the hands of east jerusalem: something round,
something small to tear at for pith.

the first time i see a trans body, it drives a tractor
across a field. bright orange camel of the raspberry
patch. my subconscious a hymnal. erupts in the
kitchen. chop chop the cutting board: be thou my
vision.

take the fraying words, dip them in glue. paper-
mâché the heart. the heart hardens into a beehive; the
bees fly in and out. honey of the desert drips down
my legs, dribbles my thighs. buzz buzz. catastrophe.
i am trying to shed my womanness. instead, i spend
$27.82 on a topical cream for a yeast infection.

most women do not get complete relief of symptoms
in just 1 day says the bright blue box. most women
get some improvement in 1 day and complete relief
by 7 days. i shake my finger at the box. i am not a
woman. when is my relief?

Note: This poem is from a larger manuscript.

Published October 17th, 2021

emet ezell is a community organizer, song-leader, and writer committed to prioritizing transformation over transaction. born and raised in the American South, they are happiest beneath a big blue Texas sky. emet is also the co-founder of The Barnacle Goose, a surreal Jewish magazine published by Blima Books. you can keep up with their work here or follow their catalogue of dead birds on twitter: @baruchdayanemet. when they re-incarnate, emet hopes to become a bird.

Sean Trombly is a Brooklyn based artist and architect. Sean received a Masters in Architecture from the Wentworth Institute of Technology, where they also completed their Bachelor or Science in Architecture. They are now a project manager at Joe the Architect; their architectural work is interested in uncovering patterns in reclaimed spaces by minority communities. They are a member of the Member of Wentworth Architecture Alumni Committee, and their work has been featured in Manque Magazine, Boston Voyager Magazine, and the ​​Wentworth Architecture Review. You can find more of Sean’s work on their website or by following their instagram (@seantii).