Not every day was about Mom’s attempted endings. Most days passed, as most days always pass: with Wake up sleepy head, OJ and milk-sogged Cheerios, Make sure to brush your teeth, sparkle unicorn lunch boxes and bus stops, class bells and recess-paced make believe, dusty back-of-bus-rides home, and a Fruit Roll Up/Capri Sun—sugar smack—snack with Batman or Animaniacs slouched in front of the black box. After school, Mom could be found at her usual spot: sprawled on the couch, candy wrappers strewn across her belly and chest, snoozing through mid-afternoon. My older brother took advantage of Mom’s naps by “borrowing” crumpled bills from her purse to fund his arcade addiction. One time, Eric nudged her to ask, “Mom, where’s your purse?” Then, he called after me, “Come see this; it’s like she’s on an autoloop.” He demonstrated, poking her shoulder as if it was the button to Mom the Talking Doll.

“Mom, where’s your purse?”

        It’s in the oven.

“Mom, where’s your purse?”

        It’s in the oven.

“Mom, where’s your purse?”

        It’s in the oven.

Every time we asked, that was her answer, stumbling along her slurred mumble. And we were the laugh track to our sick version of America’s Funniest Home Videos—rewinding/replaying Mom’s punchline. We didn’t ask ourselves why she seemed so sedated at 4 o’clock in the afternoon. We didn’t wonder if this was another OD. We just laughed. Because we could. When laughter found enough air in the space between Mom and us, we took the air.

Published July 13, 2025

Jenny Maaketo is a neurodivergent writer, psychiatric nurse, and former professional actress from Austin, Texas. She is currently an MFA poetry candidate at the University of Mississippi, as well as the senior poetry editor for Yalobusha Review. Jenny was a finalist for the 2024 New Letters Editor's Choice Award and the 2024 Tennessee Williams Poetry Festival Contest, a semifinalist for the 2024 Brett Elizabeth Jenkins Poetry Prize and the 2023 Crab Creek Review Poetry Prize, and she received a C.D. Wright Memorial Scholarship to attend the 2024 Poetry Program at the Community of Writers. Her poems appear or are forthcoming in Midway Journal, Acta Victoriana, Cherry Tree, The Florida Review, PRISM international, Columbia Review, and elsewhere. Jenny lives in rural Mississippi with her husband, toddler son, five dogs, two cats, and lots of love.

Carroll Dunham (born November 5, 1949) is an American painter. Working since the late 1970s, Dunham's career reached critical renown in the 1980s when he first exhibited with Baskerville + Watson, a decade during which many artists returned to painting. He is known for his conceptual approach to painting and drawing and his interest in exploring the relationship between abstraction and figuration.